By Christine S Miller
Children of aging parents often struggle when it comes time to convince Mom or Dad that it is time to downsize and move to senior housing. Whether it is to an independent senior apartment or to an assisted living community or a nursing home; the first hurdle is getting your parent to even consider the idea as a possibility. Unless it is a crisis situation, it is better to allow the senior time to get used to the idea. With time and exposure to the idea, they may even accept the idea of moving as a positive.
Seniors Frequently Resist Change:
Think about it. How long have your parents lived in their home? What does this home symbolize to them? What do they feel they are giving up if they move out of their home? Give them time to think about the idea of change. Introduce the idea in a conversational manner. Talk about "what if." Giving them time to think and consider, allows them the freedom to come to their own decision.
Old Memories
Even though senior living communities have changed dramatically over the past few years, many of us still have memories of visiting Grandma or Grandpa in that depressing Old Folks Home - called a nursing home. I remember visiting my Grandmother; the yelling of old people who had "lost their minds" (as my mother explained it); the smell of urine as I passed certain rooms. Our parents have these memories too. Sometimes these memories can be very vivid. Besides, senior apartments or communities are for "old people." I heard a great definition of "old" from a senior: "Old is always 20 years older than I am."
Presenting Senior Living as a Possibility:
Senior Communities realize the stigma they have to overcome with many seniors. To help introduce the new style of senior living, many communities host educational classes or fun senior outings for the community. Most communities offer free tours that can be scheduled around the lunch hour. Lunch is included in the tour. One group of senior communities in my area is holding a Chef's Competition and inviting the community. Check out the senior communities in your area. See what activities they are having that your parent might enjoy.
Keep the Conversation Low-Key:
Unless you are dealing with a crisis situation, keep the conversation low-key. Parent value their independence as much as we value ours. Introduce the idea long before it becomes a necessity. Let your parents explore their options. Be open to discussing possibilities with your parents. What are their choices? Some seniors are quite capable of staying in their own homes with just a little outside help. There is no "one size fits all answer."
What if They Won't Listen?
Remember, unless a parent is mentally incapacitated, they still have the right to make their own decisions. Just as your parents might not have agreed with all the decisions you have made in your life, you may not agree with all the decisions your parents make. The most important consideration is their safety. If they are adamant about staying in their own home, and they are mentally competent, it is their choice.
There are resources available to help seniors stay independent in their own home. Check with your local senior center, the local Area Agency on Aging, or check with a Senior (Elder) Advisor or Geriatric Care Manager in your local area.
Seniors Frequently Resist Change:
Think about it. How long have your parents lived in their home? What does this home symbolize to them? What do they feel they are giving up if they move out of their home? Give them time to think about the idea of change. Introduce the idea in a conversational manner. Talk about "what if." Giving them time to think and consider, allows them the freedom to come to their own decision.
Old Memories
Even though senior living communities have changed dramatically over the past few years, many of us still have memories of visiting Grandma or Grandpa in that depressing Old Folks Home - called a nursing home. I remember visiting my Grandmother; the yelling of old people who had "lost their minds" (as my mother explained it); the smell of urine as I passed certain rooms. Our parents have these memories too. Sometimes these memories can be very vivid. Besides, senior apartments or communities are for "old people." I heard a great definition of "old" from a senior: "Old is always 20 years older than I am."
Presenting Senior Living as a Possibility:
Senior Communities realize the stigma they have to overcome with many seniors. To help introduce the new style of senior living, many communities host educational classes or fun senior outings for the community. Most communities offer free tours that can be scheduled around the lunch hour. Lunch is included in the tour. One group of senior communities in my area is holding a Chef's Competition and inviting the community. Check out the senior communities in your area. See what activities they are having that your parent might enjoy.
Keep the Conversation Low-Key:
Unless you are dealing with a crisis situation, keep the conversation low-key. Parent value their independence as much as we value ours. Introduce the idea long before it becomes a necessity. Let your parents explore their options. Be open to discussing possibilities with your parents. What are their choices? Some seniors are quite capable of staying in their own homes with just a little outside help. There is no "one size fits all answer."
What if They Won't Listen?
Remember, unless a parent is mentally incapacitated, they still have the right to make their own decisions. Just as your parents might not have agreed with all the decisions you have made in your life, you may not agree with all the decisions your parents make. The most important consideration is their safety. If they are adamant about staying in their own home, and they are mentally competent, it is their choice.
There are resources available to help seniors stay independent in their own home. Check with your local senior center, the local Area Agency on Aging, or check with a Senior (Elder) Advisor or Geriatric Care Manager in your local area.
Hearts and Homes for Seniors was born from a love of Seniors and a desire to help them have the best quality of life available. As a Director of Healthcare Services for a large home care company and again as a discharge planner in the hospital, Christine watched as Seniors and their families struggled to make critical life changing decisions with minimal help.
She watched as families wrestled with the decision of where Mom or Dad would live. "I am doing the right thing?" "Will they get the help they need?" "Will they be happy?" "Does Mom need an Assisted Living?" "Does Dad need a Nursing Home?" "How do I know what they really need?" Christine chose to use her nursing experience and follow her love and compassion for Seniors. She started Hearts and Homes for Seniors.
Her mission is to help Seniors live the fullest, happiest life possible while helping families feel comfortable about the decisions and the choices they are making. Whether a client chooses to stay in the community or wants to move into a Senior apartment, Christine can guide them in making the decision. Hearts and Homes for Seniors only refers high quality companies and facilities. http://www.HeartsAndHomesForSeniors.com
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Christine_S_Miller She watched as families wrestled with the decision of where Mom or Dad would live. "I am doing the right thing?" "Will they get the help they need?" "Will they be happy?" "Does Mom need an Assisted Living?" "Does Dad need a Nursing Home?" "How do I know what they really need?" Christine chose to use her nursing experience and follow her love and compassion for Seniors. She started Hearts and Homes for Seniors.
Her mission is to help Seniors live the fullest, happiest life possible while helping families feel comfortable about the decisions and the choices they are making. Whether a client chooses to stay in the community or wants to move into a Senior apartment, Christine can guide them in making the decision. Hearts and Homes for Seniors only refers high quality companies and facilities. http://www.HeartsAndHomesForSeniors.com
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